How To Get Your Ex To Talk To You Again

One of the most painful parts of a breakup is the deafening silence from your former loving partner. As much as the arguing hurt at least there was some sort of communication going on and you felt that they were somehow a part of your life. Now you are left with nothing except for a sinking feeling that things might really be over. They won’t answer your phone calls, emails or text messages and all you want is for things to be back the way they were. It seems hard to believe that the person who had told you so many times that they loved you could so easily cut you completely out of their life.

If you feel sure that you could talk all this through if you could just get them to communicate with you, I am sorry but you are mistaken. Right now, any attempts to initiate contact with them will only be seen by them as a pathetic attempt to get them back. Each and every text message or email makes you seem more and more like a stalker. Each phone call makes you seem more needy and undesireable.

So what are you supposed to do? Each and every moment is a struggle not to want to talk with them. You miss them and every day of silence just hurts you to your core. Relax! There are a few basic facts that relate to relationships that you can use to your advantage. Here are a few tips to get you started:

Let Them Simmer – For the moment put them on the back burner and let them simmer. This relates to a cooking analogy but just for now put any attempts to get back in touch with your ex off as you would with anything that you were cooking that will take some time before it is ready. Your ex isn’t ready to talk with you right now. They will not be open to anything that you have to say even if it’s something as simple as telling them how your day was.

They are too defensive and they will always be looking for an ulterior motive on your part. They haven’t had time to miss you; the connection the two of you shared or even think about the results of their actions. It is a very emotional time for them also, even if you don’t see it. Once they have had some time for all of this to sink in all of the fears will begin appear. The same fears that you are probably having right now.

Have they found someone else?

Are things really over?

Did they really love me at all?

Have I made a terrible mistake?

Given some time, all the bad memories will fade away and soon they will be replaced by good memories of times spent together and loving words said. There will be times when they will wonder if they have made a terrible mistake and it is then that they will be more open to giving the relationship another chance just in case they were wrong.

It is often at this point that your ex will initiate contact with you. It may come in the form of an email or text message or a phone call or they might even just show up at your door. It may take a few days or a few weeks or a few months or up to a year for this to happen depending upon many factors such as how many times you tried contacting them and how angry they were when you broke up.

Have no fear. There are things that you can do to speed up this process and ways that you can literally turn the tables on your ex quickly. Once your ex has had enough time “simmering” on the back burner you can initiate contact with them again but you are not going to say the things that lie in your heart for them. As difficult as it might be for you to remain aloof and act like you don’t care, this is exactly what you are going to make your ex believe.

I personally like several of the techniques that Ryan Hall lays out in his book “Pull Your Ex Back”. As a matter of fact, the first few steps are there for the taking, free of charge, on his website. Go over them and you will see how powerful they can be if you can put yourself in your ex’s shoes. Did I mention that the first few steps are free?

This may seem like an underhanded thing to do but let’s look at it this way. If they really don’t love you any more then any attempts to get back together with them will fail miserably. If they do still love you deep down inside underneath any anger or animosity then you are helping them to bring out their true feelings. It truly is a “win-win” situation for both you and your ex if you can restore your relationship back to the loving, caring partnership that you once enjoyed.

Go to Ryan Hall’s “Pull Your Ex Back” Homepage and learn what you can do to easily get your ex pursing you like you dream of. Learn how to turn the tables on your ex and have them running back to you.